Flimsy Pretext

So...in my defense...I only found this because I was following a link on a blog that I read. Of course, once I found it, I couldn't look away (it's for charity! And gay rights!) Somehow, knowing gay men as I do (not that I do, but I can imagine) charity seems like a flimsy, flimsy pretext for ogling half-naked dudes. But then, God is a flimsy pretext for donating to church (when you get right down to it) so let's say faith. What would life be without faith in things unseen? Staring at these men, I had great faith in their cause, even though I couldn't technically see it. I also had faith in what I could see, which by the way wasn't much when compared to, say, this.

And, as Sir Winston Churchill would say, if you can't save the world doing what you love, why the fuck would you bother saving it at all? (And then he'd light one cigar off the end of the previous and resume reading "The Hard, Manly Thrust of the Axe into the Soft Cavern of the Surrendering Colonies" - just one selection from his Nobel winning ouevre - to a roomful of naked 15-year-old girls.)

So, now that I've made a feeble charge towards the high ground, let me shoutout to Texas, where fundraising drives still look like this, which might explain why homosexuality has more appeal than Southern Living, except in the conflicted hearts of men like Larry Craig, where the two are just about even.

But returning to the parenthetical subject of naked 15-year-old girls ("I swear, Your Honor, I had no idea the SafeSearch was off"). When I was 15, I did not waltz around mailing naked photos of myself to rock stars. I once sent a fan letter to an actor whom I shall never name, and rest assured that should I ever be famous (unlikely) I will be motivated to change my name strictly on the possibility that that letter might still be lying around somewhere.

Vanessa Hudgens, on the other hand, seems to have gone shutter-happy in the nude, which confirms my suspicion that there was something off about her. She has sneaky eyes.

And on the other hand, aren't our kids tech-savvy nowadays?